Santa Quotes - Page 6

• Radar threw his books into his locker and shut it. Then the din of conversation around us quieted just a bit as he turned his eyes toward the heavens and shouted, "IT IS NOT MY FAULT THAT MY PARENTS OWN THE WORLD'S LARGEST COLLECTION OF BLACK SANTAS.

  John Green

  Book, Eye, Parent

  John Green (2013). “Paper Towns”, p.22, A&C Black

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• He continues to smile expectantly. I take a step back. I don't want to catch whatever he has. He is a disturbing out-of-uniform Santa.

  Augusten Burroughs

  Smile, Steps, Want

  Augusten Burroughs (2013). “Dry: A Memoir”, p.47, Macmillan

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• Muggles have garden gnomes, too, you know," Harry told Ron as they crossed the lawn. "Yeah, I've seen those things they think are gnomes," said Ron, bent double with his head in a peony bush, "like fat little Santa Clauses with fishing rods.

  J. K. Rowling

  Garden, Thinking, Fishing

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• It is often argued that religion is valuable because it makes men good, but even if this were true it would not be a proof that religion is true. That would be an extension of pragmatism beyond endurance. Santa Claus makes children good in precisely the same way, and yet no one would argue seriously that the fact proves his existence. The defense of religion is full of such logical imbecilities.

  H. L. Mencken

  Children, Men, Political

  H.L. Mencken (2013). “Minority Report”, p.371, Knopf

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• The Santa Anas blew in hot from the desert, shriveling the last of the spring grass into whiskers of pale straw. Only the oleanders thrived, their delicate poisonous blooms, their dagger green leaves. We could not sleep in the hot dry nights, my mother and I.

  Janet Fitch

  Mother, Spring, Sleep

  Janet Fitch (2013). “White Oleander”, p.7, Hachette UK

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• The only bright spot in the entire evening was the presence of Kevin "Tubby" Matchwell, the eleven-year-old porker who tackled the role of Santa with a beguiling authenticity. The false beard tended to muffle his speech, but they could hear his chafing thighs all the way to the North Pole.

  David Sedaris

  Christmas, Years, Evening

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• Vlad had found himself longing to encounter those of his own kind, to travel to the streets of Elysia-that far away world, but after a while it seemed more of a fairy tale than anything else. Like Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy, only with fangs.

  Heather Brewer

  Encounters, Teeth, Elysium

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• You just gotta tell her, man,’ I said. ‘You just gotta say, “Angela, I really like you, but there’s something you need to know: when we go to my house and hook up, we’ll be watched by the twenty-four hundred eyes of twelve hundred black Santas.

  John Green

  Eye, Men, House

  John Green (2010). “Paper Towns”, p.20, Bloomsbury Publishing

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• My favorite random email I got was from some guy who wrote: "Mr. Max, with the hope of a six year old on the night before Christmas asking about Santa, I ask the same question: Do you really exist?

  Tucker Max

  Night, Years, Guy

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• Luckily, I always travel with a book, just in case I have to wait on line for Santa, or some such inconvenience.

  David Levithan

  Book, Waiting, Lines

  Rachel Cohn, David Levithan (2010). “Dash & Lily's Book of Dares”, p.36, Knopf Books for Young Readers

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• The gift from my Secret Santa wasn't anything special. That makes me sad. I bet you anything that Mary Elizabeth is my Secret Santa because only she would give me socks.

  Stephen Chbosky

  Giving, Secret, Special

  Stephen Chbosky (2013). “The Perks of Being a Wallflower YA edition”, p.65, Simon and Schuster

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• It would take more than long-stemmed roses to change my view that you're a despicable cowardy custard and a disgrace to a proud family. Your ancestors fought in the Crusades and were often mentioned in despatches, and you cringe like a salted snail at the thought of appearing as Santa Claus before an audience of charming children who wouldn't hurt a fly. It's enough to make an aunt turn her face to the wall and give up the struggle.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Hurt, Children, Giving Up

  P. G. Wodehouse (1994). “The Theatre Omnibus”, Hutchinson Radius

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• Santa Claus has already been here and everything. Want to see what he brought for you?" "Is it a big present?" "Very big." "With a big red bow on it?

  Tina St. John

  Want, Red, Bows

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• Gradually the awful truth dawns on you: that Santa Claus was just the tip of the iceberg - that your future will not be the rollercoaster ride you'd imagined, that the world occupied by your parents, the world of washing the dishes, going to the dentist, weekend trips to the DIY superstore to buy floor tiles, is actually largely what people mean when they speak of 'life'.

  Paul Murray

  Life, Mean, Weekend

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• We all ought to understand we're on our own. Believing in Santa Claus doesn't do kids any harm for a few years but it isn't smart for them to continue waiting all their lives for him to come down the chimney with something wonderful. Santa Claus and God are cousins.

  Andy Rooney

  Cousin, Atheist, Smart

  Andy Rooney (2009). “Sincerely, Andy Rooney”, p.225, Hachette UK

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• Being a lifetime wife and mother has afforded me the luxury of having multiple careers: I've been a teacher. A chauffeur. A chef. An interior decorator. A landscape architect, as well as a gardener. I’ve been a painter. A personal shopper. An accountant and a banker. I’ve been a beautician. Santa Claus. The Tooth Fairy. A movie reviewer. A nurse. A psychologist. A negotiator. An I have a Ph. D in How to Pretend Like You Don’t Mind.

  Terry McMillan

  Mother, Teacher, Careers

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• Being a superpower is like being a Santa Claus that everyone hates.

  Jon Stewart

  Hate, Santa Claus, Superpower

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• Children are grateful when Santa Claus puts in their stockings gifts of toys or sweets. Could I not be grateful to Santa Claus when he put in my stockings the gift of two miraculous legs? We thank people for birthday presents of cigars and slippers. Can I thank no one for the birthday present of birth?

  Gilbert K. Chesterton

  Sweet, Children, Grateful

  Gilbert K. Chesterton (2013). “The Essential Gilbert K. Chesterton”, p.39, Simon and Schuster

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• Have you ever wanted to put on a Santa suit?" "I have always wanted to do that," said Carter gravely.

  Richelle Mead

  Suits, Said, Carter

  Richelle Mead (2011). “Succubus Revealed”, p.143, Kensington Books

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• "Please stop," I said. "You're upsetting the black Santas."

  John Green

  Upset, Black, Said

  "Paper Towns". Book by John Green, October 16, 2008.

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• I feel warm and reassured," I whispered. "He's like Santa.

  Maureen Johnson

  Feels, Warm

  Maureen Johnson (2011). “The Name of the Star (Shades of London, Book 1)”, p.39, HarperCollins UK

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• Besides, the mhis that surrounded the compound could scramble anything from GPS to Santa Claus.

  J.R. Ward

  Gps, Santa Claus, Compounds

  J.R. Ward (2012). “Lover Reborn: A Novel of the Black Dagger Brotherhood”, p.226, Penguin

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• When I was a freshman in high school, I got a letterman jacket, which you'd think would be great stock. The jacket had the big S on it, for Santa Monica. But rather than having a football or a baseball on the S, I had a little nine iron. Girls thought it was a flute.

  Carson Daly

  Girl, Baseball, Football

  "Carson Daly: 'I'm Living Proof That the Good Guys Win'". Interview with Mickey Rapkin, www.elle.com. April 19, 2012.

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• A Christian telling an atheist they're going to hell is as scary as a child telling an adult they're not getting any presents from Santa.

  Ricky Gervais

  Christian, Atheist, Children

  Twitter post from May 2, 2013

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• A group of us started a community center in Santa Monica. We've tried different programs, and three have worked really well. A poetry group. Once a week we visit Venice High and talk to girls at risk.

  Lisa Bonet

  Girl, Venice, Community

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

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