A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.
God finally caught his eye.
When I was a waiter, I wanted to be the best waiter I could be and worked to be better at it every day.
The best number for a dinner party is two; myself and a damn good head waiter.
I asked the waiter, 'Is this milk fresh?' He said, 'Lady, three hours ago it was grass.'
We must have been hunters and gatherers but some of us were just waiters and hopers.
For we have come by different ways to this place... I can tell by the natural ease with which you wear fine clothes and the way your mouth moves when you speak with waiters in good restaurants. You have come the way of castles and cathedrals, of elegance and empire.
Enchantment can be done with writing but I think enchantment is basically a prospective or an operating system for life. That you can enchant a person who is assigning your airplane seat, your hotel room, your waiter, your waitress.
There are things you just can't do in life. You can't beat the phone company, you can't make a waiter see you until he's ready to see you, and you can't go home again.
I'm an assistant storyteller. It's like being a waiter or a gas-station attendant, but I'm waiting on six million people a week, if I'm lucky.
I have tipped waiters, and I have been tipped by waiters.
A man needs to be polite, not just to me but to everyone. I watch that. How does he treat the waiter? How does he treat the coat-check girl? How does he treat the driver?
When you find a waiter who is a waiter and not an actor, writer, musician or poet, you've found a jewel.
When those waiters ask me if I want some fresh ground pepper, I ask if they have any aged pepper.
I never taste the wine first in restaurants, I just ask the waiter to pour.
To go to the Oscars for 'Moneyball' - that was pretty amazing.
My father was a waiter basically, and when I got my first professional job as an actor, I left a job that he found me for half the amount of money. So anyone would think that they're stupid, that that would be a stupid move.
My indifference to money and my spendthrift ways are disgraceful. You have no idea how reckless I am; how often I practically throw money out of the window. I am always making good resolutions, but the next minute I forget and give the waiter eightpence.
I went into a French restaraunt and asked the waiter, 'Have you got frog's legs?' He said, 'Yes,' so I said, 'Well hop into the kitchen and get me a cheese sandwich.'
With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me.
Well, isn't Bohemia a place where everyone is as good as everyone else - and must not a waiter be a little less than a waiter to be a good Bohemian?
A diplomat these days is nothing but a head waiter who's allowed to sit down occasionally.
The age of your children is a key factor in how quickly you are served in a restaurant. We once had a waiter in Canada who said, "Could I get you your check?" and we answered, "How about the menu first?"
A real litmus test for me is how people treat someone who is waiting on them. That's a dealbreaker for me.If I were on the verge of getting into a serious relationship and I saw that person be mean to a waiter... I'm out.
It is a good thing that life is not as serious as it seems to a waiter.
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