Bars Drinking Quotes - Page 2

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.

Jack Lemmon

Funny, Music, Morning

95 Copy quote
An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.

Ernest Hemingway

Book, Drinking, Beer

Ernest Hemingway (2008). “The Good Life According to Hemingway”, Ecco

113 Copy quote

Show source
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and likes to see us happy.

Benjamin Franklin

Humorous, Drinking, Beer

66 Copy quote
Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.

W. C. Fields

Drinking, Beer, Reality

20 Copy quote
A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.

W. C. Fields

Funny, Drinking, Book

90 Copy quote
I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.

Winston Churchill

Military, Drinking, Taken

In Quentin Reynolds By Quentin Reynolds (1964) ch. 11

42 Copy quote

Show source
If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt.

Dean Martin

Retirement, Drinking, Book

"Famous drinkers" by Rob Parker, www.theguardian.com. April 18, 2004.

146 Copy quote

Show source
Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called everybody, and they meet at the bar.

Drew Carey

Funny, Sarcastic, Jobs

47 Copy quote
It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.

George Burns

Clever, Drinking, Drunk

127 Copy quote
Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.

Dave Barry

Fun, Drinking, Book

"Vegetable Magnetism" by Dave Barry, www.washingtonpost.com. March 17, 1991.

25 Copy quote

Show source
Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it.

Winston Churchill

Drinking, Beer, Wife

23 Copy quote
Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.

Ernest Hemingway

Funny, Witty, Clever

Ernest Hemingway (2008). “The Good Life According to Hemingway”, Ecco

126 Copy quote

Show source
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

Dean Martin

Clever, Lying, Humorous

In Paul Dickson Official Rules (1978) p. 112

214 Copy quote

Show source
Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer.

Henry Lawson

Party, Drinking, Beer

59 Copy quote
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

Frank Sinatra

Love, Bible, Sarcastic

185 Copy quote
Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.

Wilhelm II

Funny, Kings, Women

149 Copy quote
Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink.

Nancy Astor

Husband, Drinking, Beer

17 Copy quote
Drinking beer doesn't make you fat, it makes you lean...Against bars, tables, chairs, and poles.

Gerard Way

Drinking, Beer, Alcohol

27 Copy quote
Too much of anything is bad, but too much Champagne is just right.

F. Scott Fitzgerald

Drinking, Wine, Scotch

"Facepaint, champagne and antelope skin - writers' oddball quirks revealed" by Charlotte Seager, www.theguardian.com. July 23, 2015.

27 Copy quote

Show source
I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.

W. C. Fields

Funny, Witty, Strong

93 Copy quote
It's better to spend money like there's no tomorrow than to spend tonight like there's no money.

P. J. O'Rourke

Funny, Money, Ireland And The Irish

P. J. O'Rourke (2007). “Modern Manners: An Etiquette Book for Rude People”, p.288, Grove/Atlantic, Inc.

29 Copy quote

Show source
A drink a day keeps the shrink away.

Edward Abbey

Drinking, Beer, Drunk

Edward Abbey, R. Crumb (1985). “The Monkey Wrench Gang”, p.127, Dream Garden Press

15 Copy quote

Show source
No soldier can fight unless he is properly fed on beef and beer.

John Churchill, 1st Duke of Marlborough

Drinking, Book, Fighting

20 Copy quote
There is nothing which has yet been contrived by man, by which so much happiness is produced as by a good tavern.

Samuel Johnson

Happiness, Beer, Men

In James Boswell 'The Life of Samuel Johnson' (1791) vol. 2, p. 452 (21 March 1776)

20 Copy quote

Show source
Give an Irishman lager for a month and he's a dead man. An Irishman's stomach is lined with copper, and the beer corrodes it. But whiskey polishes the copper and is the saving of him.

Mark Twain

Drinking, Beer, Men

18 Copy quote