Money isn't the most important thing in life, but it's reasonably close to oxygen on the 'gotta have it' scale.
If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank.
Money talks, bullshit walks.
Congratulations on your job at the bank! Yes. You work for the bank. After taxes, your largest expense is your mortgage and credit-card debt.
Money won't make you happy... but everybody wants to find out for themselves.
The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.
Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
Ah, yes, divorce... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.
It is pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth have both failed.
If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars.
Somebody said to me, 'But the Beatles were anti-materialistic.' That's a huge myth. John and I literally used to sit down and say, 'Now, let's write a swimming pool.'
Time is more valuable than money. You can get more money, but you cannot get more time.
Money has never made man happy, nor will it, there is nothing in its nature to produce happiness. The more of it one has the more one wants.
What is the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector? The taxidermist takes only your skin.
Too many people spend money they haven't earned to buy things they don't want to impress people they don't like.
Money doesn't make you happy. I now have $50 million but I was just as happy when I had $48 million.
A bank book makes good reading - better than some novels.
Everyone should have enough money to get plastic surgery
It isn't necessary to be rich and famous to be happy. It's only necessary to be rich.
Money and women. They're two of the strongest things in the world. The things you do for a woman you wouldn't do for anything else. Same with money.
You can be young without money but you can't be old without it.
Money doesn't talk, it swears.
A fool and his money are soon elected.
Money and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have.
Money is like manure. You have to spread it around or it smells.
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