Funny Birthday Quotes - Page 2

• Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself.

  Tom Wilson

  Happy Birthday, Wisdom, Silly

  29 Copy quote

• Like many women my age, I am 28 years old.

  Mary Schmich

  Funny, Birthday, Knowledge

  21 Copy quote

• Thanks to Facebook, I never forget the birthdays of people I don't really know.

  Andy Borowitz

  Birthday, People, Age

  FaceBook post by Andy Borowitz from Aug 31, 2011

  11 Copy quote

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• You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's like, 'See if you can blow this out.'

  Jerry Seinfeld

  Happy Birthday, Blow, Cake

  15 Copy quote

• The best birthdays of all are those that haven't arrived yet.

  Robert Orben

  Birthday, Funny Happy Birthday, Inspirational Birthday

  19 Copy quote

• At times is it seems that I am living my life backward, and that at the approach of old age my real youth will begin. My soul was born covered with wrinkles. Wrinkles my ancestors and parents most assiduously put there and that I had the greatest trouble removing.

  Andre Gide

  Birthday, Real, Wrinkles

  Andre Gide (2017). “Pretexts: Reflections on Literature and Morality”, p.286, Routledge

  9 Copy quote

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• May you live all the days of your life.

  Jonathan Swift

  Inspirational, Life, Birthday

  Jonathan Swift (1768). “The works of Dr. Jonathan Swift ...: With the author's life and character; notes, historical, critical, and explanatory; tables of contents, and indexes. More complete than any preceding edition ... Accurately corrected by the best editions”, p.153

  42 Copy quote

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• If you're not getting older, you're dead.

  Tom Petty

  Funny Happy Birthday, Getting Older, Humorous Birthday

  "The Tavis Smiley Show", www.pbs.org. June 15, 2010.

  35 Copy quote

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• The older the fiddler, the sweeter the tune.

  Pope Paul VI

  Birthday, Age, Tunes

  24 Copy quote

• As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two.

  Norman Wisdom

  Funny, Birthday, Memories

  "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  1542 Copy quote

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• When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.

  Gracie Allen

  Funny Inspirational, Women, Funny Happy Birthday

  31 Copy quote

• Men are like wine - some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.

  Pope John XXIII

  Birthday, Drinking, Wine

  108 Copy quote

• Old age is not for sissies.

  Malcolm Forbes

  Birthday, Age, Sissy

  10 Copy quote

• Growing old is like being increasingly penalized for a crime you haven't committed.

  Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

  Birthday, Growing Up, Getting Older

  72 Copy quote

• Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.

  Dorothy Parker

  Birthday, Age, May

  166 Copy quote

• All the world is birthday cake, so take a piece, but not too much.

  George Harrison

  Happy Birthday, Friends, Cake

  101 Copy quote

• Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life.

  H. H. Asquith

  Happy Birthday, Retirement, Clever

  In Observer 15 Apr. 1923

  31 Copy quote

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• They tell you that you'll lose your mind when you grow older. What they don't tell you is that you won't miss it very much.

  Malcolm Cowley

  Birthday, Missing You, Mind

  Malcolm Cowley (1982). “The view from 80”, Penguin Books, 1982

  16 Copy quote

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• A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.

  Erma Bombeck

  Birthday, Marriage, Husband

  Erma Bombeck (2013). “The Grass Is Always Greener Over the Septic Tank”, p.135, Open Road Media

  9 Copy quote

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• Old age is like everything else. To make a success of it, you've got to start young.

  Theodore Roosevelt

  Happy Birthday, Congratulations, Journey

  Theodore Roosevelt (2015). “Theodore Roosevelt on Bravery: Lessons from the Most Courageous Leader of the Twentieth Century”, p.7, Skyhorse Publishing, Inc.

  76 Copy quote

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• God gave us the gift of life; it is up to us to give ourselves the gift of living well.

  Voltaire

  Life, Happy Birthday, Giving

  88 Copy quote

• You've heard of the three ages of man - youth, age, and you are looking wonderful.

  Francis Spellman

  Funny, Birthday, Meaningful

  8 Copy quote

• People ask me what I'd most appreciate getting for my eighty-seventh birthday. I tell them, a paternity suit.

  George Burns

  Birthday, Retirement, People

  61 Copy quote
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  Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children.

  George Bernard Shaw

  Funny, Happy Birthday, Family

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  71 Copy quote

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• I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing 'Happy Birthday.'

  Steven Wright

  Funny, Happy Birthday, Friends

  38 Copy quote