Redneck Quotes - Page 12

• You might be a redneck if your beer can collection is considered a tourist attraction in your home town.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Home, Beer, Towns

  7 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you celebrate Groundhog Day because you believe in it.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Believe, Groundhog Day, Might

  12 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you have to check in the bottom of your shoe for change so you can get Grandma a new plug of tobacco.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Grandma, Shoes, Might

  7 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if the tobacco chewers in your family aren't just men.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Men, Might, Our Family

  7 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Over You, Cash, Might

  7 Copy quote

• I rely heavily on Thomas Sowell's magnificent book, Black Rednecks, White Liberals. He points out that blacks in the North perform better, academically, than whites in the South where they did not have much of an emphasis on learning. But please note that I'm not the one making that argument in that section about Michael Moore. And by the way, I'm not a man. White men have done a lot. It's silly to write a book titled, Stupid White Men.

  Ann Coulter

  Stupid, Silly, Book

  Source: aalbc.com

  6 Copy quote

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• You might be a redneck if you go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend, and you only need to buy one gift.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Mom, Girlfriend, Shopping

  8 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if your primary source of income is the pawn shop.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Income, Might, Pawns

  4 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if The Salvation Army declines your mattress.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Army, Might, Salvation

  7 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you have a very special baseball cap, just for formal occasions.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Baseball, Special, Might

  8 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if your kids are going hungry tonight because you just had to have those Yosemite Sam mud flaps.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Kids, Yosemite, Tonight

  Jeff Foxworthy (2006). “The Redneck Doesn't Fall Far from the Tree”, p.47, Harper Collins

  7 Copy quote

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• You might be a redneck if going to the bathroom involves shoes and a flashlight.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Shoes, Might, Bathroom

  29 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if someone tells you you have something in your teeth, and you take them out to see what it is.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Teeth, Might, Ifs

  4 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Might, Grades, Duty

  5 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you think Silence of the Lambs is what happens when Larry walks out to the barn.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Thinking, Silence, Barns

  4 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if somebody hollers ho-down and your girlfriend hits the floor.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Girlfriend, Down And, Might

  5 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you've ever worn a dress that is strapless with a bra that isn't.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Dresses, Might, Bras

  4 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger changed your life.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Texas, Might, Rangers

  6 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you wish your outhouse was as nice as those at the state park.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Nice, Wish, Might

  4 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you've ever hauled a can of paint to the top of a water tower to defend your sister's honor.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Water, Honor, Towers

  4 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if the richest member of your family bought a house and you have to help take the wheels off of it.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  House, Might, Wheels

  5 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you've ever stared at a can of orange juice because it said concentrate.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Orange Juice, Might, Said

  17 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you keep a fly swatter in the front seat of the car so you can reach your kids in the back seat of the car.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Kids, Car, Might

  5 Copy quote

• First of all, "redneck" is a state of mind, not a person. So the "racist redneck" thing is a state of mind, not a geographical location. So I don't mean to imply that it's just Southerners. And if you don't recognize the racist underpinnings and the emotional reactive response you're getting from these teabaggers because we have a black president, then you are either being dishonest, or you've never seen the teabaggers.

  Janeane Garofalo

  Mean, Emotional, Black

  5 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if your grandmother has ever been asked to leave a bingo game because of her language.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Grandmother, Games, Bingo

  4 Copy quote