You have to count on living every single day in a way you believe will make you feel good about your life - so that if it were over tomorrow, you'd be content with yourself.
Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance.
I choose a block of marble and chop off whatever I don't need.
Big Data is like teenage sex: everyone talks about it, nobody really knows how to do it, everyone thinks everyone else is doing it, so everyone claims they are doing it.
As I may or may not say to the Lord on Judgment Day, "You ask a lot of questions for someone who has so much explaining to do"
If you ask me anything I don't know, I'm not going to answer.
It isn't necessary to have relatives in Kansas City in order to be unhappy.
I would have made a good pope.
I think it would be a good idea.
Men, their rights, and nothing more; women, their rights, and nothing less.
A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he's finished.
I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money.
Criticism is prejudice made plausible.
We'll love you just the way you are if you're perfect.
Never raise your hand to your children - it leaves your midsection unprotected.
If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
Men don't care what's on TV. They only care what else is on TV.
It is better to be quotable than to be honest.
Art is the only way to run away without leaving home.
Men have become the tools of their tools.
Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.
Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you no lies.
In war it does not matter who is right, but who is left.
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