If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door.
Life is far too important a thing ever to talk seriously about.
A mother is the best friend God ever gave.
Why do they call it "rush hour" when nothing moves?
God knows life sucks. It's right there in the Bible. The book of Job is all about Job asking God to take away pain and misery. And God says, "I can't take away pain and misery because then no one would talk to me."
I don't want to own anything that won't fit into my coffin.
Anything you lose automatically doubles in value.
The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets.
Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.
Everything has been figured out, except how to live.
If you can't control your peanut butter, you can't expect to control your life.
Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.
The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life.
The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage.
All the world's a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed.
You should always go to other people's funerals, otherwise, they won't come to yours.
I was wise enough to never grow up while fooling most people into believing I had.
I don't know what to say so I'll just say what's in my heart...badoom, badoom, badoom.
Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.
To err is human; to forgive, infrequent.
If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.
If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you'd best teach it to dance.
Life is something that everyone should try at least once.
There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
I'm sorry, if you were right, I'd agree with you.
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