Until we meet again, may the good Lord take a liking to you.
God invented whiskey to keep the Irish from ruling the world.
Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Sooooo, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!
The most important things to do in the world are to get something to eat, something to drink and somebody to love you.
Drinking beer doesn't make you fat, it makes you lean...Against bars, tables, chairs, and poles.
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
The worst thing about some men is that when they are not drunk they are sober.
In heaven there is no beer. That's why we drink ours here.
It's better to spend money like there's no tomorrow than to spend tonight like there's no money.
May the saddest day of your future be no worse than the happiest day of your past.
I only take a drink on two occasions - when I'm thirsty and when I'm not.
We have always found the Irish a bit odd. They refuse to be English.
I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper and the old men and old women warmer in the winter and happier in the summer.
When money's tight and is hard to get And your horse has also ran, When all you have is a heap of debt A PINT OF PLAIN IS YOUR ONLY MAN.
Oh, he occasionally takes an alcoholiday.
One drink is to many for me and a thousand not enough.
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
Beer is proof that God loves us.
Here's to our wives and girlfriends...may they never meet!
When I die, I want to decompose in a barrel of porter and have it served in all the pubs in Dublin. I wonder would they know it was me?
I think the Irish woman was freed from slavery by bingo. They can go out now, dressed up, with their handbags and have a drink and play bingo. And they deserve it.
Work like you don't need the money.
Give an Irishman lager for a month and he's a dead man. An Irishman's stomach is lined with copper, and the beer corrodes it. But whiskey polishes the copper and is the saving of him.
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