The worst thing about some men is that when they are not drunk they are sober.
I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
God has a brown voice, as soft and full as beer.
I've only been in love with a beer bottle and a mirror.
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.
Beer is a wholesome liquor.....it abounds with nourishment
God made yeast, as well as dough, and loves fermentation just as dearly as he loves vegetation.
I drink when I have occasion, and sometimes when I have no occasion.
There is nothing which has yet been contrived by man, by which so much happiness is produced as by a good tavern.
Beer: Helping ugly people have sex since 3000 B. C.
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and likes to see us happy.
Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.
He that drinks fast, pays slow.
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
There can't be good living where there is not good drinking.
I think this would be a good time for a beer.
All other nations are drinking Ray Charles beer and we are drinking Barry Manilow.
And malt does more than Milton can to justify God's ways to man.
A woman is like beer. They look good, they smell good, and you'd step over your own mother just to get one!
Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.
We old folks have to find our cushions and pillows in our tankards. Strong beer is the milk of the old.
Give my people plenty of beer, good beer, and cheap beer, and you will have no revolution among them.
A little bit of beer is divine medicine.
Beer does not make itself properly by itself. It takes an element of mystery and of things that no one can understand.
Why is American beer served cold? So you can tell it from urine.
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