Funny Friend Quotes - Page 3

• I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.

  Mark Twain

  Funny, Life, Friendship

  Mark Twain (2014). “Mark Twain on Common Sense: Timeless Advice and Words of Wisdom from America's Most-Revered Humorist”, p.31, Skyhorse Publishing, Inc.

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• I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.

  J. R. R. Tolkien

  Family, Party, Book

  J.R.R. Tolkien (2012). “The Fellowship of the Ring: Being the First Part of The Lord of the Rings”, p.32, Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

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• 

  One loyal friend is worth ten thousand relatives.

  Euripides

  Friendship, Positive, Family

  Aeschylus, Sophocles, Euripides (1959). “Euripides”

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• I've always said that in politics, your enemies can't hurt you, but your friends will kill you.

  Ann Richards

  Friendship, Hurt, Enemy

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• Friendship is a pretty full-time occupation if you really are friendly with somebody. You can't have too many friends because then you're just not really friends.

  Truman Capote

  Friendship, Best Friend, Friendly

  Lawrence Grobel, Truman Capote (1985). “Conversations with Capote”, E P Dutton

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• I hate it in friends when they come too late to help.

  Euripides

  Friendship, Hate, Too Late

  Euripides (1958). “Euripides: Rhesus, translated by R. Lattimore. The suppliant women, translated by F. Jones. Orestes, translated by W. Arrowsmith. Iphigenia in Aulis, translated by C. R. Walker”

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• It's the friends you can call up at 4 a.m. that matter.

  Marlene Dietrich

  Friendship, Best Friend, Cute Relationship

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• One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim.

  George Carlin

  Friendship, True Friend, Funny Best Friend

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• You can always tell a real friend: when you've made a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job.

  Laurence J. Peter

  Friendship, Best Friend, Jobs

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• A true friend is one who overlooks your failures
  and tolerates your success.

  Doug Larson

  Funny, Friendship, Patience

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  When a woman becomes her own best friend life is easier.

  Diane von Furstenberg

  Life, Friendship, Best Friend

  188 Copy quote

• Happiness is like peeing in your pants. Everyone can see it, but only you can feel the warmth.

  Jon Foreman

  Funny Friendship, Funny Best Friend, Cute Friendship

  114 Copy quote

• If you want a friend in Washington, buy a dog.

  Harry S. Truman

  Funny, Hilarious, Dog

  "The Wit & Wisdom of Harry Truman".

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• There are some things you can't share without ending up liking each other.

  J. K. Rowling

  Funny Friendship, Liking Someone, Potters

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• Friendship is love minus sex and plus reason. Love is friendship plus sex minus reason

  Mason Cooley

  Friendship, Funny Love, Sex

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• When a woman like that whom I've seen so much, All of a sudden drops out of touch; Is always busy and never can, Spare you a moment, it means a man.

  Alice Duer Miller

  Funny Friendship, Mean, Men

  Alice Duer Miller, “Forsaking All Others Part 4”

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• The capacity for friendship is God's way of apologizing for our families.

  Jay McInerney

  Friendship, Family, Inspiring

  Jay McInerney (2011). “The Last of the Savages”, p.3, Vintage

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• The world is round so that friendship may encircle it.

  Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

  Friendship, Cute Best Friend, World

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• There's not a word yet, for old friends who've just met.

  Jim Henson

  Friendship, Best Friend, Real Friends

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• The antidote for fifty enemies is one friend.

  Aristotle

  Friendship, Relationship, True Friend

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• There is nothing I would not do for those who are really my friends. I have no notion of loving people by halves, it is not my nature.

  Jane Austen

  Love, Friendship, Cute Relationship

  Jane Austen (2014). “Jane Austen Collection: illustrated - 6 eBooks and 140+ illustrations”, p.1247, Ageless Reads

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• Most people enjoy the inferiority of their best friends.

  Lord Chesterfield

  Friendship, Best Friend, People

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• No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend.

  Groucho Marx

  Funny, Friendship, Inspiration

  Groucho Marx (2009). “Groucho And Me”, p.97, Da Capo Press

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• When a man laughs at his troubles he loses a great many friends. They never forgive the loss of their prerogative.

  Francis Bacon

  Loss, Men, Laughing

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• Love is only chatter, friends are all that matter.

  Gelett Burgess

  Friendship, Love Is, Matter

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