Nothing ever tasted better than a cold beer on a beautiful afternoon with nothing to look forward to than more of the same.
Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world.
Milk is for babies. When you grow up you have to drink beer.
I feel sorry for people who do not have a Bible to lean on.
What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch?
Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.
That's the problem with drinking, I thought, as I poured myself a drink. If something bad happens you drink in an attempt to forget; if something good happens you drink in order to celebrate; and if nothing happens you drink to make something happen.
There are more old drunks than there are old doctors.
We old folks have to find our cushions and pillows in our tankards. Strong beer is the milk of the old.
Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it.
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.
I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts.
Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.
Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.
Beer. Now there's a temporary solution!
I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.
Some people wanted champagne and caviar when they should have had beer and hot dogs.
A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.
For a quart of ale is a dish for a king.
An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.
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