Running Quotes - Page 24

• I like to stand near ATM machines, and when somebody types in their pin number, I go, 'Got it!' And then I run away.

  Demetri Martin

  Numbers, Machines, Atm

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• I'm the leader of the platoon and I run gambling and lotteries, dances and I sell beer illegally. I'm a con man and I'm thoroughly lovable.

  Steve Martin

  Beer, Men, Gambling

  "Comedians pull rank in 'Sgt. Bilko'" by Paul Vercammen, www.cnn.com. March 29, 1996.

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• You could place one product in a first-run telecast, a second product what that program is rerun, and a third product when the show goes into syndication, and another product when it goes on cable.

  David Brenner

  Goes On, Reruns, Firsts

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• You run into a party and [a] woman comes up to you. She's the most beautiful creature you ever saw - Ava Gardner - and says, "I like you and why don't we get together?" What are you going to say, "No"? You'd have to be an idiot. She was an incredible creature.

  Artie Shaw

  Beautiful, I Like You, Women

  " Artie Shaw, the Reluctant 'King of Swing'", NPR, March 8, 2002.

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• I understand I'm running against a person who is so anxious to become president, he will do whatever it takes.

  George W. Bush

  President, Anxious, Whatever It Takes

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• Isn't this a wonderful country? I was in Florida. I'm staying at a motel called the Three Palms. It's run by a middle-aged couple, one of whom is missing a hand. OK! That's what I thought, too! But they got upset when I asked.

  Emo Philips

  Country, Couple, Florida

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• When I was a kid, my favourite time of the year when I was child was that magical first snowfall. I'd yell Yippee! Snow! and run up to the front door and shout You know the deal... You have to let me in now.

  Emo Philips

  Children, Kids, Doors

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• Margaret Thatcher drove us like there was no tomorrow. But I think there is a genuine feeling now that this macho, workaholic, earn lots of money way of life has run its course. There has been a shift in attitude. People are looking for a more balanced approach.

  Edwina Currie

  Attitude, Thinking, People

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• I am very determined and the sport is my passion. I believe I am born for running.

  Cathy Freeman

  Sports, Believe, Passion

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• Obama is running again for spite.

  Mort Sahl

  Spite

  Twitter post from Apr 03, 2011

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• When I went to jail, reality hit so hard that it took my breath away, took my stance away, took my strength away. I was there buck naked, humiliated, sitting in my own crap and urine - this is a metaphor. My ego had run off. Your ego is the biggest coward.

  Tim Allen

  Reality, Jail, Ego

  “Tim Allen: What I've Learned” by Cal Fussman, www.esquire.com. October 11, 2011.

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• P. Diddy's gonna be exhausted, you know, running with the Olympic torch in one hand and the torch he'll always carry for J-Lo in the other.

  Doug Benson

  Hands, Torches, Exhausted

  "Best Week Ever". TV Series, www.imdb.com. 2004-.

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• I think the people I talk about are generally so stupid that they don't even know I'm saying bad things about them. I've run into Paris Hilton and she's like, Oh, I love your show. And I'm like, You can't love my show if you can hear.

  Chelsea Handler

  Stupid, Love You, Thinking

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• It's cute when you meet young boys and they're bright red and breathing like they've run up the stairs, but they're just sitting outside the door. I've had phone calls in the middle of the night when I stay at hotels.

  Cameron Diaz

  Cute, Boys, Night

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• Without identical twins, you'll never get to experience entering a hotel room with one of them and watching him run into the full-length mirror because he though he saw his brother.

  Ray Romano

  Brother, Mirrors, Entering

  Ray Romano (1999). “Everything and a Kite”, Bantam

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• You know you're lazy when you run out of toilet paper and use the cardboard roll to wipe with.

  Dane Cook

  Lazy, Use, Wipe

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• Some people have constipation of the brain but their mouth has the runs.

  Dane Cook

  People, Brain, Mouths

  FaceBook post by Dane Cook from Sep 03, 2014

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• Comedy crowds - we always want to come out and ask you, 'How you feeling?' We always say that, 'By a round of applause, how do you feel?' Right? 'By a round of applause, how you feeling?' It's the only place in the world that you judge how you're feeling by a round of applause... There's never like a car accident, people all over the ground, people running over - 'Ma'am! Ma'am! By a round of applause, how do you feel? By a round of applause - she's not clapping!

  Dane Cook

  People, Judging, Car

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• You might be a redneck if when you run out of gas, you put gin in the gas tank.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Redneck, Tanks, Might

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• I can't run a company... I can't even run my own life!

  Adam Sandler

  Company, My Own, I Can

  "Fictional character: Longfellow Deeds". "Mr. Deeds", www.imdb.com. 2002.

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• Sarah Palin has managed to use her failed vice presidential run to put herself in a position of power and influence. Joe Biden won the race and he hasn't been able to put himself in a position of power and influence.

  Craig Ferguson

  Race, Position Of Power, Presidential

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• It doesn't really exist, this Frat Pack. We run into each other on occasions and we all like each other's films, I guess, but there isn't some big funny restaurant or bar where we all hang out. At least, if there is, they haven't invited me.

  Will Ferrell

  Bars, Film, Restaurants

  "The $29 million man" by Jason Solomons, www.theguardian.com. November 19, 2006.

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• A small man intoxicated by being allowed to run around with the big, aggressive, powerful boys after so many years as a corduroy-clad peacenik.

  George Galloway

  Powerful, Men, Boys

  "In his own words", www.theguardian.com. April 23, 2003.

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• We need to remember that we can't compete endlessly with other nations that set their income taxes substantially lower than ours. They will attract jobs, and investment. They may generate more tax - and they may even persuade their tennis champs to run that extra half yard

  Boris Johnson

  Jobs, Tennis, Yards

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• There is a much cheaper way, less complicated way to bring Iraq and Saddam Hussein to its knees: it is simply to send the Bush economic team over there and let them run the country.

  John F. Kerry

  Country, Team, Iraq

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