Airline Quotes - Page 11

• We have the best customer satisfaction record, based on Transportation Dept. statistics, of any airline in America, the fewest complaints filed per 100,000 passengers carried. So you're not just getting low fares, you're also getting wonderful customer service.

  Herb Kelleher

  America, Records, Statistics

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• I was just in London - there is a 6 hour time difference. I'm still confused. When I go to dinner, I feel sexy. When I go to bed, I feel hungry.

  Henny Youngman

  Funny, Sexy, Confused

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• The food on the plane was fit for a king. "Here, King!"

  Henny Youngman

  Funny, Kings, Humor

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• What President of the Airline is doing is, he's urging everyone to give up their frequent flyer miles for sick kids... But as I was reading this, there were two empty seats next to me. Why can't sick kids sit there? If they're so concerned with sick kids, shouldn't they have like a pen of sick kids next to the gate?

  David Cross

  Funny, Giving Up, Reading

  "David Cross: The Pride Is Back". TV Special, September 18, 1999.

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• We just found out my little brother has a peanut allergy, which is very serious I know. But still I feel like my parents are totally overreacting - they caught me eating a tiny little bag of airline peanuts and they kicked me out of his funeral.

  Anthony Jeselnik

  Funny, Brother, Humor

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• I like to travel business or first class. I wouldn't go out of my way to pay through the nose if the particular airline had a perfectly adequate economy class - but I do like to be comfortable when traveling.

  Hilary Devey

  Class, Noses, Adequate

  "Hilary Devey: Interview with the new Dragon". Interview with Kate Bassett, realbusiness.co.uk. July 28, 2011.

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• People express is clearly the archetypical deregulation success story and the most spectacular of my babies. It is the case that makes me the proudest.

  Alfred Kahn

  Baby, People, Deregulation

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• I really don't know one plane from the other. To me they are just marginal costs with wings.

  Alfred Kahn

  Wings, Cost, Aviation

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• You can be in London at 10 o'clock and in New York at 10 o'clock. I have never found another way of being in two places at once.

  David Frost

  New York, Two, London

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• Whenever competition is feasible it is, for all its imperfections, superior to regulation as a means of serving the public interest.

  Alfred Kahn

  Mean, Imperfection, Competition

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• We have a business that some people feel pollutes, and I happen to agree with them. ... And so on the basis of trying to do good and, you know, hopefully turn a profit, what we did was we pledged that we'd put all the profits from our airline business into trying to develop clean fuels.

  Richard Branson

  Airline Business, People, Trying

  "Richard Branson: Time To Rethink 'Business As Usual'". "Talk of the Nation" with Neal Conan, www.npr.org. December 1, 2011.

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• This new England we have invented for ourselves is not interested at all in education. It is only interested in training, both material and spiritual. Education means freedom, it means ideas, it means truth. Training is what you do to a pear tree when you pleach it and prune it to grow against a wall. Training is what you give an airline pilot or a computer operator or a barrister or a radio producer. Education is what you give children to enable them to be free from the prejudices and moral bankruptcies of their elders.

  Stephen Fry

  Spiritual, Wall, Children

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• What a waste of an education Rick Santorum is! ... Let's just pray that none of his home-schooled kids grow up to be an airline pilot, okay? That's all I'm asking. Please dear God, do not let any of these home-schooled kids grow up to be a surgeon, an airline pilot, or a nurse. Or somebody that's in charge of my trans-vaginal mandatory ultrasound. Seriously, no science-y things for them, you know, just religion, let them be all preachers or something.

  Randi Rhodes

  Growing Up, Kids, Home

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• I think there is a shadow network where everybody has infiltrated in terms of hotel concierges, restaurants, will tip off journalists or paparazzi, the airlines, everywhere.

  Charlotte Church

  Thinking, Shadow, Restaurants

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• You can divide airlines into two camps: expensive and cheap. But I believe that we will only distinguish between long-haul and short-haul airlines in the future.

  Stelios Haji-Ioannou

  Believe, Two, Long

  Source: www.spiegel.de

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• I've got stuff about airline mergers, which just shows that my stand-up is getting more insane by the minute.

  Lewis Black

  Insane, Mergers, Stuff

  Interview with Chris Mincher, tv.avclub.com. May 20, 2008.

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• I do not have a merchandise line. I don't sell knives or apparel. Though I have been approached to endorse various products from liquor to airlines to automobiles to pharmaceuticals dozens of times, I have managed to resist the temptation.

  Anthony Bourdain

  Knives, Temptation, Dozen

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• I have one brother, John, an airline pilot, who is seven years younger. He's adopted, though we're still blood related - he's my cousin. My parents couldn't have any more children after me, so when Dad's brother died, they adopted John, then just a baby.

  Gary Numan

  Baby, Cousin, Brother

  "Gary Numan: My family values" by Angela Wintle, www.theguardian.com. May 4, 2012.

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• A lot of people came into the airline business. Most of them promptly exited, minus their money.

  Robert Crandall

  Airline Business, People, Minus

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• There has always been a certain romanticism associated with the airline business. We must avoid its perpetuation at Eastern at all costs.

  Frank Borman

  Airline Business, Cost, Aviation

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• We are long-term players in the industry. We're not just crazy and emotional. We try to be logical business managers.

  Frank Lorenzo

  Crazy, Player, Emotional

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• But we agree with the NTSB that if we eliminated the thrust- reverser calculation, it would be an extra margin of safety. Airport capacity and airline efficiency are important, but safety is the most important thing.

  Laura Brown

  Airports, Safety, Important

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• Also, in the category of 'obvious but still shocking,' an animal called a 'killer whale' killed someone who was trying to play with it. Now, no one knows exactly what enraged the whale, but earlier in the week, it had been thrown off a flight by Southwest Airlines.

  Bill Maher

  Animal, Whales, Play

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• Geraldo has returned to the states. See? I told you airline security was a joke.

  Jay Leno

  States, Airline Security, Jokes

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• Nike actually has a pair of shoes called Air-Turbulence. Try getting past airline security wearing those. Might as well call them Air-Osama.

  Jay Leno

  Nike, Past, Air

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