Milk is for babies. When you grow up you have to drink beer.
Now the thing about having a baby - and I can't be the first person to have noticed this - is that thereafter you have it.
The best time I ever had with Joan Crawford was when I pushed her down the stairs in Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?
A mother is a mother from the moment her baby is first placed in her arms until eternity. It didn't matter if her child were three, thirteen, or thirty.
It is the nature of babies to be in bliss.
Babies control and bring up their families as much as they are controlled by them; in fact ... the family brings up baby by being brought up by him.
No one likes change... but babies in diapers.
What good mothers and fathers instinctively feel like doing for their babies is usually best after all.
The old Irish when immersing a babe at baptism left out the right arm so that it would remain pagan for good fighting
Adam and Eve had many advantages, but the principal one was that they escaped teething.
The only time he cries is if he’s hungry. We all have nipples. I don’t care who I offend; my baby wants to eat. If I can’t get a cover over me quick enough, so be it.
Having a baby is like falling in love again, both with your husband and your child.
A baby is an angel whose wings decrease as his legs increase.
I knew it was going to be the most extraordinary thing in my life, but how powerful it is, you can never know until you have a baby.
If you were to open up a baby's head - and I am not for a moment suggesting that you should - you would find nothing but an enormous drool gland.
Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky.
I can't think why mothers love them. All babies do is leak at both ends.
Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door.
Babies haven't any hair; Old men's heads are just as bare; between the cradle and the grave lie a haircut and a shave.
You call yourself a free spirit, a "wild thing," and you're terrified somebody's gonna stick you in a cage. Well baby, you're already in that cage. You built it yourself. And it's not bounded in the west by Tulip, Texas, or in the east by Somali-land. It's wherever you go. Because no matter where you run, you just end up running into yourself.
I always wondered why babies spend so much time sucking their thumbs. Then I tasted baby food.
Children are our most valuable natural resource.
In the sheltered simplicity of the first days after a baby is born, one sees again the magical closed circle, the miraculous sense of two people existing only for each other.
Insomnia: A contagious disease often transmitted from babies to parents.
Babies! What a wonderful way to start people!
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