I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception.
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese
The second mouse gets the cheese!
There are three kinds of people: those who can count, and those who cannot.
I am not afraid of death. I just don't want to be there when it happens.
My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.
If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
If you can't convince them, confuse them.
The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
Two wrongs don't make a right.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice.
When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.
or simply:
