Drunk Quotes - Page 28

• I bowled for two years in college, because I was drunk and needed shoes.

  Kathleen Madigan

  College, Years, Shoes

  14 Copy quote

• How much more of the mosque, of prayer and fasting?
  Better go drunk and begging round the taverns.
  Khayyam, drink wine, for soon this clay of yours
  Will make a cup, bowl, one day a jar.
  When once you hear the roses are in bloom,
  Then is the time, my love, to pour the wine;
  Houris and palaces and Heaven and Hell-
  These are but fairy-tales, forget them all.

  Omar Khayyam

  Atheist, Prayer, Wine

  388 Copy quote

• I took my mother's knife and played johnny johnny johnny on the playhouse floor. I was drunk, stabbed myself every few throws. I held my hand up and there was satisfaction at seeing my blood, the way there was when I saw the red gouges onmy face that people stared at and turned away. They were thinking I was beautiful, but they were wrong, now they could see how ugly and mutilated I was.

  Janet Fitch

  Beautiful, Mother, Thinking

  Janet Fitch (2013). “White Oleander”, p.112, Hachette UK

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• I celebrate myself, and I hope soon the day will come you will be celebrating yourself. And when thousands and thousands of people around the earth are celebrating, singing, dancing, ecstatic, drunk with the divine, there is no possibility of any global suicide. With such festivity and with such laughter, with such sanity and health, with such naturalness and spontaneity, how can there be a war?

  Rajneesh

  Suicide, Laughter, War

  8 Copy quote

• It's your 21st birthday... What are you doing sober at the front row of a concert? Is it your 21st birthday? By the end of the night I promise... we will get you drunk, my friend.

  Andrew McMahon

  Night, 21st Birthday, Promise

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• By the time dessert arrives I am usually so drunk, I can't remember what I'm serving.

  Ruby Wax

  Remember, Dessert, I Can

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• There are two things to do in Juneau, drink and get drunk.

  Chuck Thompson

  Two, Drink, Things To Do

  Chuck Thompson (2007). “Smile When You're Lying: Confessions of a Rogue Travel Writer”, p.15, Macmillan

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• I had an ASU student looking for it in my shop last week, and he defined the Bacchants for me as 'those drunk chicks who killed that one dude because he wouldn't have sex with them.' His professors must be so proud. I asked him if he knew what maenads were, and instead of correctly answering that it was just another name for Bacchants, he bizarrely thought I was referring to my own testicles - as in, "'Ere now, mate, don't swing that bat around me nads.'" The conversation deteriorated quickly after that.

  Kevin Hearne

  Sex, Swings, Names

  Kevin Hearne (2011). “Hexed: The Iron Druid Chronicles, Book Two”, p.50, Del Rey

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• Discover the times when you're most creative - mornings, nights, afternoons - and clear the time to work then. Many writers find the mornings are best, and the afternoons are only good for editorial corrections, or getting the washing done. Others can only work through the night, drunk.

  Deborah Moggach

  Morning, Night, Creative

  11 Copy quote

• I was walking late one night along a tree-lined path; a chestnut fell at my feet. The noise it made as it burst, the resonance it provoked in me, and an upheaval out of all proportion to this insignificant event thrust me into miracle, into the rapture of the definitive, as if there were no more questions-only answers. I was drunk on a thousand unexpected discoveries, none of which I could make use of. ... This is how I nearly reached the Supreme. But instead I went on with my walk.

  Emile M. Cioran

  Night, Feet, Discovery

  Emile M. Cioran (1976). “The Trouble with Being Born”, Viking Books

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• My heart aches, and a drowsy numbness pains/ My sense, as though of hemlock I had drunk.

  John Keats

  Pain, Heart, Sadness

  'Ode to a Nightingale' (1820) st. 1

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• The Internet is like closing time at a blue-collar bar in Boston. Everyone’s drunk and ugly and they’re going to pass out in a few minutes.

  Leon Wieseltier

  Blue, Boston, Ugly

  "Stung by the Perfect Sting" by Maureen Dowd, www.nytimes.com. August 25, 2009.

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• H. L Mencken's Dictionary of the American Language supplies a long list of slang terms for being drunk, but the Irish are no slouches, either. They're spannered, rat-arsed, cabbaged, and hammered; ruined, legless, scorched, and blottoed; or simply trolleyed or sloshed. In Kerry, you're said to be flamin'; in Waterford, you're in the horrors; and in Cavan, you've gone baloobas, a tough one to wrap your tongue around if you ARE baloobas. In Donegal, you're steamin', while the afflicted in Limerick are out of their tree.

  Bill Barich

  Long, Tree, Gone

  4 Copy quote

• I was the biggest, most hopeless and most violent drunk in baseball.

  Sam McDowell

  Baseball, Hopeless, Violent

  6 Copy quote

• We certainly noted that when given the opportunity, women handle money more efficiently. They have long term vision, they manage money more carefully. Men are more callous with money. Their first reflex is to blow it by getting drunk in a pub, or on prostitutes or gambling. Women, on the other hand, are endowed with a tremendous sense of self-sacrifice and try to get the best out of the money, for their children, but also for their husbands.

  Muhammad Yunus

  Children, Husband, Sacrifice

  8 Copy quote

• My father's life was changed right before my eyes [when he trusted Christ]. It was like someone reached down and switched on a light inside him. He touched alcohol only once after that. He got the drink only as far as his lips and that was it-after forty years of drinking! He didn't need it any more. Fourteen months later, he died form complications of his alcoholism. But in that fourteen-month period over a hundred people in the area around my tiny hometown committed their lives to Jesus Christ because of the change they saw in the town drunk, my dad.

  Josh McDowell

  Bible, Jesus, Dad

  28 Copy quote

• I didn't start MADD to deal with alcohol. I started MADD to deal with the issue of drunk driving.

  Candy Lightner

  Issues, Alcohol, Driving

  "MADD struggles to remain relevant". The Washington Times Interview, www.washingtontimes.com. August 6, 2002.

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• I had been brought up and trained to have the utmost contempt for people who got drunk - and I would have liked to have the boozing scholars of the Universities wheeled into line and properly chastised for their squalid misuse of what I must ever regard as a gift of the gods.

  Winston Churchill

  People, Lines, Misuse

  Winston Churchill (2010). “My Early Life: 1874-1904”, p.133, Simon and Schuster

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• I mean, the more a man was in the Devil's power, the less he would be aware of it, on the principle that a man is still fairly sober as long as he knows he's drunk.

  C. S. Lewis

  Mean, Men, Long

  C. S. Lewis (2014). “God in the Dock”, p.46, Wm. B. Eerdmans Publishing

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• Only sad sacks and conformists need things like no kiss on New Year's Eve to remind them to feel lonely. They're as bad as the people who need St. Patty's Day as an excuse to get drunk or Halloween to wear slutty outfits. You can feel sorry for yourself and dress like a hooker all year round: Hallmark never needs to know.

  Julie Klausner

  New Year, Lonely, Sorry

  Julie Klausner (2010). “I Don't Care About Your Band: What I Learned from Indie Rockers, Trust Funders, Pornographers, Felons, Faux-Se nsitive Hipsters, and Other Guys I've Dated”, p.161, Penguin

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• I’ve never been drunk in my life. I don’t use recreational drugs.

  Paula Abdul

  Drug, Use, Stupid Celebrity

  "Paula Abdul: 'I Have a Brain'". www.cbsnews.com. December 30, 2010.

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• Isn't there a danger with Tweeting, like drunk dialing? Isn't there a drunk Tweeting danger?

  Julianna Margulies

  Danger

  6 Copy quote

• We got married drunk in Vegas . . . We dated for a year, and we got married at a drive-through chapel in a cab. [We thought] you have to go down to the courthouse and sign papers and stuff, so who knew? We were married, and apparently now that [Rob] is getting married for real, his lawyer dug up something.

  Janeane Garofalo

  Real, Vegas, Years

  "Janeane Garofalo’s ‘marriage’ no joke". pagesix.com. November 13, 2012.

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• Country music is about new love and it's about old love. It's about gettin' drunk and gettin' sober. It's about leavin' and it's about comin' home. It's real music sung by real people for real people, the people that make up the backbone of this country. You can call us rednecks if you want. We're not offended, 'cause we know what we're all about. We get up and go to work, we get up and go to church, and we get up and go to war when necessary.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Country, Real, War

  CMT Awards, 2007.

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• I've always watched actors on the red carpet getting drunk and making idiots of themselves and now I'm happy to join their ranks

  Ethan Hawke

  Actors, Red, Idiot

  4 Copy quote