Funny Motivational Quotes - Page 4

• You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.

  Jack London

  Inspirational, Funny, Witty

  Jack London (2015). “Jack London on Adventure: Words of Wisdom from an Expert Adventurer”, p.5, Skyhorse Publishing, Inc.

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• I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.

  Oscar Wilde

  Funny, Clever, Hipster

  Oscar Wilde (2007). “Epigrams of Oscar Wilde”, p.153, Wordsworth Editions

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• Sometimes, Chelsea, I wonder, how you get by from day to day. It's a good thing you're so voluptuous.

  Chelsea Handler

  Sometimes, Wonder, Good Things

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• Just because I rock doesn't mean I am made of stone.

  Jim Carrey

  Mean, Rocks, Stones

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• When anybody laughs, he has no mind, no thought, no problem, no suffering.

  H. W. L. Poonja

  Inspirational, Funny, Laughing

  55 Copy quote

• If you don't know where you're going any road will do

  Lewis Carroll

  Baseball, Travel, Goals Dreams

  58 Copy quote

• Good things come to those who initiate.

  Susan RoAne

  Patience, Fitness, Workout

  Susan RoAne (2009). “Face to Face: How to Reclaim the Personal Touch in a Digital World”, p.21, Simon and Schuster

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• I wanted to have a career in sports when I was young, but I had to give up the idea. I'm only six feet tall, so I couldn't play basketball. I'm only 190 pounds, so I couldn't play football, and I have 20/20 vision, so I couldn't be a referee.

  Jay Leno

  Basketball, Sports, Football

  40 Copy quote

• Every cloud has its silver lining but it is sometimes a little difficult to get it to the mint.

  Don Marquis

  Funny, Hope, Witty

  Don Marquis (2012). “Archy and Mehitabel”, p.54, Anchor

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• Most comedy is based on getting a laugh at somebody else's expense. And I find that that's just a form of bullying in a major way. So I want to be an example that you can be funny and be kind, and make people laugh without hurting somebody else's feelings.

  Ellen DeGeneres

  Funny, Bullying, Hurt

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• Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body

  George Carlin

  Happiness, Fun, Over You

  81 Copy quote

• All good things come to those who wait.

  Paullina Simons

  Patience, Monday, Funny Inspirational

  22 Copy quote

• I have a simple philosophy: Fill what's empty. Empty what's full. Scratch where it itches.

  Alice Roosevelt Longworth

  Life, Inspiring, Funny Inspirational

  Quoted in Peter Passell and Leonard Ross, The Best (1974)

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• Never put off till tomorrow what you can do day after tomorrow just as well.

  Mark Twain

  Funny, Life, Sarcastic

  "Mark Twain: Collected Tales, Sketches, Speeches, and Essays Vol. 1 1852-1890".

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• Even I don't know what you're doing, and I know everything.

  Karen Marie Moning

  Funny Inspirational, Wonderful Life, Schindler's List

  Karen Marie Moning (2016). “The Fever Series 7-Book Bundle: Darkfever, Bloodfever, Faefever, Dreamfever, Shadowfever, Iced, Burned”, p.386, Dell

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• Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't make them all yourself.

  Usher

  Strong Women, Funny Inspirational, Mistake

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• If life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade. And try to find somebody who's life gives them vodka, and have a party.

  Ron White

  Funny, Giving, I Believe

  "Blue Collar Comedy Tour Rides Again". Comedy, Documentary, www.imdb.com. 2004.

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• Good things come to those who wait.

  Jess C Scott

  Inspirational, Funny, Patience

  Jess C. Scott (2010). “Porcelain”, p.147, jessINK

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• Don't take life too seriously.

  RuPaul

  Life, Sarcastic, Funny Inspirational

  RuPaul (2010). “Workin' It!: RuPaul's Guide to Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Style”, p.12, Harper Collins

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• You're at your best when you don't know what you're doing.

  Paul Stanley

  Funny Inspirational, Top Management, Civil War

  75 Copy quote

• When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second.

  Albert Einstein

  Love, Girl, Funny Inspirational

  7 Copy quote

• Never put off until tomorrow what you can put off forever.

  P. J. Plauger

  Inspirational, Procrastination, Forever

  58 Copy quote

• I guess good things come to those who wait.

  Kurt Busch

  Patience, Monday, Funny Inspirational

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• All things come to those who wait.

  Violet Fane

  Patience, Funny Inspirational, Life Changing

  Violet Fane (1872). “From Dawn to Noon: Poems”, p.85

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• My nursery school did a production of 'The Three Little Pigs.' I played the third pig. When the wolf knocked on my door, I refused to get up and answer it because, to me, he was knocking the wrong way. I just lay there, snoring away on stage, fully immersed in my character. My dad turned to my mom and said: 'Dustin Hoffman.'

  Zooey Deschanel

  Mom, Dad, School

  10 Copy quote