Funny Motivational Quotes - Page 4

• You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.

  Jack London

  Inspirational, Funny, Witty

  Jack London (2015). “Jack London on Adventure: Words of Wisdom from an Expert Adventurer”, p.5, Skyhorse Publishing, Inc.

  88 Copy quote

  Show source

• I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.

  Oscar Wilde

  Funny, Clever, Hipster

  Oscar Wilde (2007). “Epigrams of Oscar Wilde”, p.153, Wordsworth Editions

  547 Copy quote

  Show source

• Sometimes, Chelsea, I wonder, how you get by from day to day. It's a good thing you're so voluptuous.

  Chelsea Handler

  Sometimes, Wonder, Good Things

  4 Copy quote

• Just because I rock doesn't mean I am made of stone.

  Jim Carrey

  Mean, Rocks, Stones

  10 Copy quote

• Most comedy is based on getting a laugh at somebody else's expense. And I find that that's just a form of bullying in a major way. So I want to be an example that you can be funny and be kind, and make people laugh without hurting somebody else's feelings.

  Ellen DeGeneres

  Funny, Bullying, Hurt

  21 Copy quote

• I have a simple philosophy: Fill what's empty. Empty what's full. Scratch where it itches.

  Alice Roosevelt Longworth

  Life, Inspiring, Funny Inspirational

  Quoted in Peter Passell and Leonard Ross, The Best (1974)

  45 Copy quote

  Show source

• Every cloud has its silver lining but it is sometimes a little difficult to get it to the mint.

  Don Marquis

  Funny, Hope, Witty

  Don Marquis (2012). “Archy and Mehitabel”, p.54, Anchor

  20 Copy quote

  Show source

• Good things come to those who initiate.

  Susan RoAne

  Patience, Fitness, Workout

  Susan RoAne (2009). “Face to Face: How to Reclaim the Personal Touch in a Digital World”, p.21, Simon and Schuster

  51 Copy quote

  Show source

• Never put off till tomorrow what you can do day after tomorrow just as well.

  Mark Twain

  Funny, Life, Sarcastic

  "Mark Twain: Collected Tales, Sketches, Speeches, and Essays Vol. 1 1852-1890".

  272 Copy quote

  Show source

• Even I don't know what you're doing, and I know everything.

  Karen Marie Moning

  Funny Inspirational, Wonderful Life, Schindler's List

  Karen Marie Moning (2016). “The Fever Series 7-Book Bundle: Darkfever, Bloodfever, Faefever, Dreamfever, Shadowfever, Iced, Burned”, p.386, Dell

  12 Copy quote

  Show source

• If you don't know where you're going any road will do

  Lewis Carroll

  Baseball, Travel, Goals Dreams

  64 Copy quote

• All good things come to those who wait.

  Paullina Simons

  Patience, Monday, Funny Inspirational

  24 Copy quote

• I wanted to have a career in sports when I was young, but I had to give up the idea. I'm only six feet tall, so I couldn't play basketball. I'm only 190 pounds, so I couldn't play football, and I have 20/20 vision, so I couldn't be a referee.

  Jay Leno

  Basketball, Sports, Football

  42 Copy quote

• Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body

  George Carlin

  Happiness, Fun, Over You

  88 Copy quote

• When anybody laughs, he has no mind, no thought, no problem, no suffering.

  H. W. L. Poonja

  Inspirational, Funny, Laughing

  58 Copy quote

• If life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade. And try to find somebody who's life gives them vodka, and have a party.

  Ron White

  Funny, Giving, I Believe

  "Blue Collar Comedy Tour Rides Again". Comedy, Documentary, www.imdb.com. 2004.

  758 Copy quote

  Show source

• Good things come to those who wait.

  Jess C Scott

  Inspirational, Funny, Patience

  Jess C. Scott (2010). “Porcelain”, p.147, jessINK

  110 Copy quote

  Show source

• I don't know why femininity should be associated with weakness. Women should be free to express who they are without thinking, 'I need to act like a man, or I need to tone it down to be successful.' That's a very good way to keep women down.

  Zooey Deschanel

  Badass, Women, Successful

  8 Copy quote

• My nursery school did a production of 'The Three Little Pigs.' I played the third pig. When the wolf knocked on my door, I refused to get up and answer it because, to me, he was knocking the wrong way. I just lay there, snoring away on stage, fully immersed in my character. My dad turned to my mom and said: 'Dustin Hoffman.'

  Zooey Deschanel

  Mom, Dad, School

  11 Copy quote

• There was never a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him to sleep.

  Ralph Waldo Emerson

  Love, Mom, Mother

  60 Copy quote

• You're at your best when you don't know what you're doing.

  Paul Stanley

  Funny Inspirational, Top Management, Civil War

  80 Copy quote

• When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second.

  Albert Einstein

  Love, Girl, Funny Inspirational

  7 Copy quote

• Don't take life too seriously.

  RuPaul

  Life, Sarcastic, Funny Inspirational

  RuPaul (2010). “Workin' It!: RuPaul's Guide to Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Style”, p.12, Harper Collins

  25 Copy quote

  Show source

• Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't make them all yourself.

  Usher

  Strong Women, Funny Inspirational, Mistake

  37 Copy quote

• The elevator to success is out of order, but the stairs are always open.

  Zig Ziglar

  Inspirational, Funny Work, Order

  65 Copy quote