Funny Valentines Day Card Quotes

• Between lovers a little confession is a dangerous thing.

  Helen Rowland

  Love, Relationship, Littles

  Helen Rowland (1909). “Reflections of a Bachelor Girl”

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• Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.

  Groucho Marx

  Love, Funny, Witty

  149 Copy quote

• Like I've always said, love wouldn't be blind if the braille weren't so damned much fun.

  Armistead Maupin

  Valentines Day, Fun, Valentine's Day

  Armistead Maupin (1992). “Maybe the moon: a novel”, HarperCollins Publishers

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• If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live without you.

  A. A. Milne

  Love, Friendship, Birthday

  "Winnie-the-Pooh: The House at Pooh Corner". Book by A. A. Milne, 1928.

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• The heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing.

  Blaise Pascal

  Love, Inspirational, Life

  Pensees no. 680 (1658)

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• I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

  Rita Rudner

  Love, Funny, Life

  242 Copy quote

• Men have died from time to time, and worms have eaten them, but not for love.

  William Shakespeare

  Love, Funny Valentines Day, Men

  William Shakespeare (1998). “As You Like It”, p.57, Courier Corporation

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• All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.

  Charles M. Schulz

  Love, Funny, Valentines Day

  245 Copy quote

• True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.

  Erich Segal

  Love, Inspiring, Valentines Day

  86 Copy quote
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  Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.

  Robert A. Heinlein

  Love, Life, Positive

  Robert A. Heinlein (1987). “Stranger in a Strange Land”, p.340, Penguin

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• Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!

  Jay Leno

  Funny, Romantic, Valentines Day

  97 Copy quote

• No one will ever win the battle of the sexes; there's too much fraternizing with the enemy.

  Henry A. Kissinger

  Love, Funny, Leadership

  39 Copy quote

• If you have only one smile in you give it to the people you love.

  Maya Angelou

  Inspirational, Life, Smile

  Maya Angelou (2012). “The Collected Autobiographies of Maya Angelou”, p.424, Modern Library

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• What the world really needs is more love and less paper work.

  Pearl Bailey

  Love, Romantic, Valentines Day

  "Weekly World News" Magazine, Vol. 26, No. 33, April 25, 2005.

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• A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous.

  Ingrid Bergman

  Love, Valentines Day, Nature

  "An Uncommon Scold". Book by Abby Adams, 1989.

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• If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

  Dorothy Parker

  Funny, Anniversary, Valentines Day

  98 Copy quote

• Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket or a holding pattern over Philadelphia.

  Judith Viorst

  Love, Funny, Valentines Day

  "The Problem Behind All Problems". Book by Michael Hansbury, 2009.

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• There's a certain part of the contented majority who love anybody who is worth a billion dollars.

  John Kenneth Galbraith

  Love, Political, Majority

  The Guardian, May 23, 1992.

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• Love is a game that two can play and both win.

  Eva Gabor

  Love, Valentines Day, Fun

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

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• I require only three things of a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid.

  Dorothy Parker

  Marriage, Wedding, Stupid

  Dorothy Parker, Stuart Y. Silverstein (2009). “Not Much Fun: The Lost Poems of Dorothy Parker”, p.19, Simon and Schuster

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• Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Funny, Marriage, Hilarious

  1275 Copy quote

• One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry.

  Oscar Wilde

  Love, Funny, Sarcastic

  Oscar Wilde (2004). “The Best of Oscar Wilde: Selected Plays and Writings”, p.144, Penguin

  83 Copy quote

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• Better to have loved and lost than to live with regret.

  Big Pun

  Valentines Day, True Love, Sad Love

  Song: Punish Me, Album: Capital Punishment, 1998

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• Today is February 14th - St. Valentine's day. Women call it Love day, while men name it as Extortion day.

  Jay Leno

  Valentines Day, Men, Names

  16 Copy quote

• The lover is a monotheist who knows that other people worship different gods but cannot himself imagine that there could be other gods.

  Theodor Reik

  Love, People, Different

  Theodor Reik (2017). “Love and Lust: On the Psychoanalysis of Romantic and Sexual Emotions”, p.100, Routledge

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