Sarcastic Quotes - Page 6

• We have the best government that money can buy.

  Mark Twain

  Funny, Money, Sarcasm

  131 Copy quote

• The Englishman who has lost his fortune is said to have died of a broken heart.

  Ralph Waldo Emerson

  Heart, Broken, Lost

  Ralph Waldo Emerson (1866). “The Complete Works of Ralph Waldo Emerson: Comprising His Essays, Lectures, Poems, and Orations”, p.68

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• I've had them both, and I don't think much of either.

  Beatrix Lehmann

  Thinking

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• She is a water bug on the surface of life.

  Gloria Steinem

  Water, Bugs, Surface

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• He was a bit like a corkscrew. Twisted, cold and sharp.

  Kate Cruise O'Brien

  Cold, Twisted, Bits

  Kate Cruise O'Brien (1980). “A gift horse, and other stories”, Olympic Marketing Corp

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• The English think soap is civilization.

  Heinrich von Treitschke

  Thinking, Civilization, Insulting

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• Modesty is the artifice of actors, similar to passion in call girls.

  Jackie Gleason

  Girl, Passion, Actors

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• Russians will consume marinated mushrooms and vodka, salted herring and vodka, smoked salmon and vodka, salami and vodka, caviar on brown bread and vodka, pickled cucumbers and vodka, cold tongue and vodka, red beet salad and vodka, scallions and vodka-anything and everything and vodka.

  Hedrick Smith

  Mushrooms, Caviar, Beets

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  A good conscience is a continual Christmas.

  Benjamin Franklin

  Happiness, Christmas, Honesty

  Benjamin Franklin (2004). “Poor Richard's Almanack”, p.92, Barnes & Noble Publishing

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• [on pop idol Donny Osmond] He has Van Gogh's ear for music.

  Billy Wilder

  Life, Music, Witty

  "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com.

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• I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

  Steven Wright

  Funny, Life, Birthday

  120 Copy quote

• Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.

  Will Rogers

  Funny, Book, Beer

  "The Wordsworth Dictionary of Quotations". Book by Connie Robertson, 1996.

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• I sometimes think that God in creating man somewhat overestimated his ability.

  Oscar Wilde

  Funny, God, Appreciation

  Oscar Wilde (2012). “Oscar Wilde's Wit and Wisdom: A Book of Quotations”, p.12, Courier Corporation

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• For your information, I would like to ask a question.

  Samuel Goldwyn

  Funny, Witty, Sarcasm

  "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com.

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• He is useless on top of the ground; he ought to be under it, inspiring the cabbages.

  Mark Twain

  Inspiration, Useless, Cabbage

  Mark Twain (2015). “Pudd'nhead Wilson”, p.129, Xist Publishing

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• This is one race of people for whom psychoanalysis is of no use whatsoever.

  Sigmund Freud

  Funny, Witty, Race

  68 Copy quote

• Her only flair is in her nostrils.

  Pauline Kael

  Memorable, Flair

  Pauline Kael (1996). “Raising Kane and Other Essays”, Marion Boyars Publishers

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• America is one long expectoration.

  Oscar Wilde

  America, Long, Insulting

  John Stuart Anderson, Oscar Wilde (1982). “The picture of Dorian Gray: a modern theatre adaptation of Oscar Wilde's classic novel”

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• She's been on more laps than a napkin.

  Walter Winchell

  Lap, Napkins

  26 Copy quote

• She could carry off anything; and some people said that she did.

  Ada Leverson

  People, Said

  Ada Leverson (2012). “Love at Second Sight”, p.42, tredition

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• She had a pretty gift for quotation, which is a serviceable substitute for wit.

  W. Somerset Maugham

  Belief, Human Bondage, Substitutes

  "The Creative Impulse". Harper's Bazar, August 1926.

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• He never said a foolish thing nor never did a wise one.

  John Wilmot

  Wise, Foolish, Said

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• She's the sort of woman who lives for others - you can tell the others by their hunted expression.

  C. S. Lewis

  Women, Expression, Live For Others

  Screwtape Letters (1942) no. 26

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• He is so mean, he won't let his little baby have more than one measle at a time.

  Eugene Field

  Baby, Mean, Littles

  Eugene Field, Peter Pauper Press (1966). “A comic primer”

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• I thought men like that shot themselves.

  George V

  Men, Shots

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