Funny Inspirational Quotes - Page 4

• We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.

  Phyllis Diller

  Funny, Hilarious, Mom

  1274 Copy quote

• Some people walk in the rain, others just get wet.

  Roger Miller

  Inspirational, Funny, Positive

  166 Copy quote

• All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner.

  Red Skelton

  Inspirational, Marriage, Mistake

  "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com.

  95 Copy quote

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• Don't let schooling interfere with your education.

  Mark Twain

  Inspirational, Funny, Cute

  79 Copy quote

• Effort only fully releases its reward after a person refuses to quit.

  Napoleon Hill

  Inspirational, Perseverance, Determination

  Dr. Robert C. Worstell, Dorothea Brande, Eark Nightingale, Claude M. Bristol, Napoleon Hill (2017). “Mindset StackingTM Inspirational Journal VolumeSS02”, p.144, Lulu.com

  108 Copy quote

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• Do the right thing. It will gratify some people and astonish the rest.

  Mark Twain

  Inspirational, Funny, Motivational

  281 Copy quote

• I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at parties. Often, as a sign of their great respect, they don't even invite me.

  Dave Barry

  Respect, Party, Book

  "Is Findlay’s water safe?". "The Courier" Interview, thecourier.com. February 15, 2016.

  18 Copy quote

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• The elevator to success is out of order. You'll have to use the stairs... one step at a time.

  Joe Girard

  Inspirational, Motivational, Inspiring

  Joe Girard, Robert Casemore (1979). “How to Sell Yourself”, Simon & Schuster

  193 Copy quote

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• Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need.

  Will Rogers

  Funny, Smile, Money

  114 Copy quote

• A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject.

  Winston Churchill

  Funny, Change, Business

  Winston Churchill (1987). “The Irrepressible Churchill: Stories, Sayings and Impressions of Sir Winston Churchill”, London : Robson Books

  109 Copy quote

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• Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.

  Confucius

  Love, Inspirational, Life

  182 Copy quote

• Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.

  Elbert Hubbard

  Inspirational, Funny, Life

  Elbert Hubbard (1917). “In the Spotlight: Personal Experiences of Elbert Hubbard on the American Stage”

  165 Copy quote

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• If you let your head get too big, it'll break your neck.

  Elvis Presley

  Inspirational, Funny, Humor

  47 Copy quote

• Here is the test to find whether your mission on Earth is finished: if you're alive, it isn't.

  Richard Bach

  Inspirational, Funny, Life

  "Illusions: The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah". Book by Richard Bach, 1977.

  63 Copy quote

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• The secret of business is to know something that nobody else knows.

  Aristotle Onassis

  Inspirational, Success, Leadership

  50 Copy quote

• Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there.

  Josh Billings

  Inspirational, Funny, Motivational

  85 Copy quote

• Know the rules well, so you can break them effectively.

  Dalai Lama

  Inspirational, Funny, Life

  59 Copy quote

• A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.

  W. C. Fields

  Funny, Sarcastic, Money

  "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  351 Copy quote

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• ‎Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats.

  Voltaire

  Positive, Short Life, Funny Motivational

  Elizabeth Cooney Leister, Voltaire (1985). “Voltaire's Candide”, Barrons Educational Series Incorporated

  138 Copy quote

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• Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain - and most fools do.

  Benjamin Franklin

  Leadership, Bullying, Motivation

  106 Copy quote

• Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.

  Margaret Mead

  Inspirational, Funny, Inspiring

  302 Copy quote

• The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.

  Will Rogers

  Funny, Hilarious, Fools Day

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

  173 Copy quote

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• Readers are plentiful; thinkers are rare.

  Harriet Martineau

  Reading, Knowledge, Library

  Harriet Martineau (1837). “Society in America”, p.176

  67 Copy quote

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• I've been on a calendar, but I've never been on time.

  Marilyn Monroe

  Funny, Time, Calendars

  30 Copy quote

• I'm not crazy about reality, but it's still the only place to get a decent meal.

  Groucho Marx

  Funny, Witty, Fear

  78 Copy quote