Witty Quotes - Page 23

• There is one thing even more vital to science than intelligent methods; and that is, the sincere desire to find out the truth, whatever it may be.

  Charles Pierce

  Truth, Science, Intelligent

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• I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix.

  Dan Quayle

  Funny, Phoenix, California

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy - but that could change.

  Dan Quayle

  Funny, Freedom, Believe

  Quoted in Wall Street Journal, 26 May 1989

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• For NASA, space is still a high priority.

  Dan Quayle

  Funny, Science, Space

  Esquire, Remarks to NASA employees, August 1992.

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• It's wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago.

  Dan Quayle

  Funny, Stupid, Political

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• This President is going to lead us out of this recovery.

  Dan Quayle

  Funny, Recovery, Political

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• The global importance of the Middle East is that it keeps the Far East and the Near East from encroaching on each other.

  Dan Quayle

  Political, Middle East, Importance

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• Smile. Nod. Say something witty before he finds out what an incredible geek you are.

  Ellen Hopkins

  Geek, Incredibles

  Ellen Hopkins (2012). “Ellen Hopkins: Crank Trilogy”, p.52, Simon and Schuster

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• If you're not having fun, you're doing something wrong.

  Groucho Marx

  Funny, Wisdom, Humorous

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• Hail, hail Freedonia, land of the free!

  Groucho Marx

  Funny, Humorous, Land

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• Conversation should be pleasant without scurrility, witty without affectation, free without indecency, learned without conceitedness, novel without falsehood.

  William Shakespeare

  Memorable, Should, Conversation

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• Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men -- the other 999 follow women.

  Groucho Marx

  Motivational, Leadership, Funny Inspirational

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• Any place I hang my head is home.

  Groucho Marx

  Funny, Humorous, Home

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• Gently they go, the beautiful, the tender, the kind; Quietly they go, the intelligent, the witty, the brave. I know. But I do not approve. And I am not resigned.

  Edna St. Vincent Millay

  Beautiful, Intelligent, Brave

  Buck in the Snow (1928) "Dirge Without Music"

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• I'm so overexposed, I'm making Paris Hilton look like a recluse.

  Barack Obama

  Funny, Sarcastic, Wisdom

  "The Senator's Humble Beginning" by Mark Leibovich, www.washingtonpost.com. February 24, 2005.

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• If you're too open-minded; your brains will fall out.

  Lawrence Ferlinghetti

  Funny, Sarcastic, Fall

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• The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not.

  Mark Twain

  Funny, Inspirational Life, Food

  Mark Twain (2014). “Mark Twain on Common Sense: Timeless Advice and Words of Wisdom from America's Most-Revered Humorist”, p.9, Skyhorse Publishing, Inc.

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• This is how we court girls in America. We grab them and kiss them. And if they don't like it, we do it again, harder and longer, until they surrender. It saves us hours of witty repartee.

  Lisa Kleypas

  Girl, Kissing, America

  Lisa Kleypas (2008). “A Wallflower Christmas: A Novel”, p.35, Macmillan

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• Those who are easily shocked should be shocked more often.

  Mae West

  Change, Sarcastic, Humorous

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• he's a genius, she's a genius, wow, you know alot of geniuses, you should meet some stupid people sometime, you might learn something

  Woody Allen

  Stupid, Humorous, People

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• Be pretty if you can, be witty if you must, but be gracious if it kills you.

  Elsie de Wolfe

  Party, Tongue, Manners

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• Bishop was all done with the witty converstaion. "Will you swear?" And Myrnin said, shockingly, "I will." And he proceeded to, a string of swearwords that made Claire blink. He ended with, "--frothy fool-born apple-john! Cheater of vandals and defiler of dead dogs!" and did another twirl and bow. He looked up with a red, red grin that was more like a leer. "Is that what you meant, my lord?

  Rachel Caine

  Dog, Cheater, Apples

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• Never ask while you are doing it if what you are doing is fun. Don't introduce even your most reliably witty acquaintance as someone who will set the table on a roar.

  Christopher Hitchens

  Fun, Tables, Introducing

  Christopher Hitchens (2010). “Hitch 22: A Memoir”, p.306, Atlantic Books Ltd

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• I have never been able to understand the complaint that a story is "depressing" because of its subject matter. What depresses me are stories that don't seem to know these things go on, or hide them in resolute chipperness; "witty stories," in which every problem is the occasion for a joke; "upbeat" stories that flog you with transcendence. Please. We're grown ups now.

  Tobias Wolff

  Depressing, Stories, Goes On

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• Curran grinned and my heart made a little jump. I didn’t expect that. “That’s it? That’s your witty comeback?” “Yep.” Eloquence ’R’ Us. When in trouble, keep it monosyllabic—safer that way.

  Ilona Andrews

  Heart, Littles, Way

  Ilona Andrews (2009). “Magic Strikes”, p.43, Penguin

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