Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!
All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.
True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket or a holding pattern over Philadelphia.
Always get married in the morning. That way if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted the whole day.
Love is a game that two can play and both win.
What the world really needs is more love and less paper work.
Like I've always said, love wouldn't be blind if the braille weren't so damned much fun.
One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry.
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties.
The poor wish to be rich, the rich wish to be happy, the single wish to be married, and the married wish to be dead.
Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance.
I want a man who's kind and understanding. Is that too much to ask of a millionaire?
No one will ever win the battle of the sexes; there's too much fraternizing with the enemy.
Better to have loved and lost than to live with regret.
Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you're in.
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
or simply: