Dov Davidoff Quotes - Page 9

Quotes about:

• I'd like you much better if you didn't like yourself so much.

  Dov Davidoff

  Like You, Like Yourself, Ifs

  FaceBook post by Dov Davidoff from Mar 01, 2012

  4 Copy quote

• What is sex addiction? I asked a doctor and the guys goes, Sex addiction... People will end up doing something they don't want to do just for sex. Isn't that called a first date, man? If sex was the result of something I wanted to do, there'd be condoms all over my PlayStation.

  Dov Davidoff

  Sex, Men, Doctors

  4 Copy quote

• I'd put my faith in god, but I haven't met him, and I've been hurt before.

  Dov Davidoff

  Hurt, Faith In God, Mets

  4 Copy quote

• I like shitty strip clubs. They look like what they are. I know what to expect. Unlike Congress, at least we know everybody is for sale.

  Dov Davidoff

  Looks, Clubs, Congress

  FaceBook post by Dov Davidoff from Mar 07, 2012

  4 Copy quote

• Anticipation almost always exceeds the reality of that which we anticipated.

  Dov Davidoff

  Reality, Anticipation, Exceed

  4 Copy quote

• You're pregnant? Congratulations, the world needs another mindless, semiliterate consumer.

  Dov Davidoff

  Congratulations, Needs, World

  4 Copy quote

• Everybody's angry with me because, apparently, I outed my cousin during an argument over a turkey leg. My cousin goes, 'You had the last leg.' I was like, 'You're gay.

  Dov Davidoff

  Cousin, Gay, Turkeys

  4 Copy quote

• We should create a holiday that celebrates money for what it is, essentially worthless paper, upon which we agree to pretend it has value.

  Dov Davidoff

  Holiday, Paper, Celebrate

  4 Copy quote

• Parenthood seems really rewarding... like martyrdom, but without the glamour.

  Dov Davidoff

  Parenthood, Glamour, Martyrdom

  4 Copy quote

• I'd like to expand the definition of the word 'success' to include 'failure' as the one seems inseparable from the other.

  Dov Davidoff

  Success, Definitions, Inseparable

  4 Copy quote

• I'm no quitter, unless it comes to human relationships or math and science.

  Dov Davidoff

  Math, Quitter, Humans

  6 Copy quote

• I consider myself a patriot, but not for the traditional reasons. I'm just really passionate about apple pie.

  Dov Davidoff

  Apples, Pie, Passionate

  7 Copy quote

• Facebook is great for getting upset about things people say even though you haven't seen them in 12 years.

  Dov Davidoff

  Years, People, Upset

  4 Copy quote

• Women want a man who is sensitive, but god forbid you can't get it up after being frightened by a small woodland animal.

  Dov Davidoff

  Animal, Men, Want

  4 Copy quote

• The next actor I meet that uses the term 'courageous' to describe another actor's performance is getting punched in the face.

  Dov Davidoff

  Use, Actors, Next

  4 Copy quote

• Perhaps depression is a perfectly natural reaction to the human condition.

  Dov Davidoff

  Perfectly Natural, Reactions, Human Condition

  4 Copy quote

• Please use anger for something positive like hurting people that deserve it or writing jokes.

  Dov Davidoff

  Hurt, Writing, People

  4 Copy quote

• If no-eye contact sex were a sport, I'm not saying I'd make it to the Olympics, but I like my chances.

  Dov Davidoff

  Sports, Sex, Eye

  5 Copy quote

• Water polo would be much more interesting if they hadn't gotten rid of the horses.

  Dov Davidoff

  Horse, Water, Interesting

  6 Copy quote

• I'm neither professional fighter nor physicist, therefore on some level I will always consider myself a failure.

  Dov Davidoff

  Levels, Fighter, Physicist

  4 Copy quote

• Being proud of your nationality is like congratulating yourself for inheriting money.

  Dov Davidoff

  Proud, Be Proud, Proud Of You

  6 Copy quote

• Comedy has been my way to reconcile with the world. I didn't really set out to do this, but comedy has served as my outlet to address my issues I have with this crazy world.

  Dov Davidoff

  Crazy, Issues, World

  4 Copy quote

• Horoscopes, like bad sitcoms, are created for people that I don't relate to.

  Dov Davidoff

  People, Horoscopes, Sitcom

  4 Copy quote

• Only bugs can truly appreciate the beauty of flowers.

  Dov Davidoff

  Flower, Appreciate, Bugs

  4 Copy quote

• It's a wonder you don't see the zebra being trotted out as a metaphor for racial harmony more often.

  Dov Davidoff

  Zebras, Wonder, Harmony

  16 Copy quote

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