Comedian Quotes - Page 26

• I am not so secretly a comedian. I write a lot of my own material if you've seen videos I've done. I write jokes.

  Laura Benanti

  Writing, Video, Done

  Source: www.broadwayworld.com

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• Donald Trump is not running for president. This is devastating news for Trump's supporters - all of whom are late night comedians.

  Conan O'Brien

  Running, Night, President

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• People who become comedians… come from pain, come from conflict.

  Harvey Korman

  Pain, People, Conflict

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• I always think everyone else is funnier than me. I look at other comedians and I say, 'I wish I was that good.' People think I'm funny, and I say, 'I'm not.'

  Carrot Top

  Thinking, People, Wish

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• When I was younger I always thought, 'If I were ever a comedian I'd make it like a rock concert.' I wanted to generate that type of enthusiasm and excitement.

  Carrot Top

  Rocks, Enthusiasm, Excitement

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• Will Rogers used to say he wouldn't run for president no matter how badly the country needed a comedian.

  Will Rogers

  Running, Country, President

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• I'm an entertainer, not a commentator. If you're a comedian your job is to make people laugh.

  Johnny Carson

  Jobs, People, Laughing

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• The mother-in-laws themselves weren't natural jokes but most comedians used to use that.

  Allen Toussaint

  Mother, Law, Use

  "'Fresh Air' Remembers Hit Songwriter, Pianist And Producer Allen Toussaint". "Fresh Air" with Dave Davies, www.npr.org. November 13, 2015.

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• I try to be personal, but that's not me, either. What seems to work best, and the tweets I enjoy reading the most, are when comedians just give jokes. It's a great joke of the day thing, especially revolving around current events. But that's not my forte either, so I find myself in no man's land with Twitter. I don't particularly enjoy giving me out to everyone.

  John Cho

  Reading, Men, Land

  Source: collider.com

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• Those who say that Serena isn't serious about tennis; she wants to go Hollywood. That's true, about Hollywood. I would love to get a lot of acting gigs. But you wouldn't believe the stuff I've turned down because of my tournament schedule...I would do well beside (comedian) Chris Tucker.

  Serena Williams

  Believe, Tennis, Acting

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• As comedians, we have the opportunity to convey a message that will have an effect. The best can make you laugh and cry, the way musicians and actors can.

  Jay Pharoah

  Opportunity, Laughing, Musician

  Source: www.esquire.com

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• Eddie Murphy is to comedians what Nicki Minaj is to Spanx.

  Chris Rock

  Spanx, Murphy

  "Eddie Murphy awarded Mark Twain Prize: Here are the parts you might not see on the PBS special" by Peggy McGlone, www.washingtonpost.com. October 19, 2015.

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• I've seen comedians make people laugh by being either really dark and sad and touching, or really strange and bizarre and creepy. You can take the format and do whatever you want with it, and that seemed interesting to me.

  Amy Seimetz

  Dark, People, Laughing

  Source: www.interviewmagazine.com

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• I think comedians should focus on what makes them happy, what art form fulfills them the most. Don't be calculated about it and say, 'Okay, I'm gonna tweet, and I'm gonna podcast, and I'm gonna do standup, and one of those things is going to lead me to my own TV show.' I don't think that should be the goal.

  Scott Aukerman

  Art, Thinking, Tv Shows

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• If you're trying to cast the widest possible net to attract the largest selection of men or women, the last thing you should do is to start listing your income, political views, and the like. Avoid mentioning specific comedians, shows, or movies unless those are top-tier attributes on your list.

  Amy Webb

  Men, Views, Political

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• They're the darkest people I know, comedians.

  Jake Gyllenhaal

  People, Knows

  "10 Years After 'Brokeback,' Jake Gyllenhaal Remembers Heath Ledger: "Way Beyond His Years as a Human"". Interview with Stephen Galloway, www.hollywoodreporter.com. November 25, 2015.

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• I find comedians to be the biggest cocksuckers, because they don't want people to know how easy it is.

  Gavin McInnes

  People, Want, Easy

  Source: www.interviewmagazine.com

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• I come from the stage. I started my career as a stand-up comedian and then later on became an actor.

  Patrick Huard

  Careers, Actors, Stage

  Source: collider.com

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• It was important to me to be cool as a comedian. I didn't want to be a crowd-pleaser who sent out the vibe of, "I need you guys." I wanted to be so cool that the audience could leave and I would still be killing, that I didn't want to have to rely on them or need them. That really appealed to me.

  Anthony Jeselnik

  Guy, Important, Needs

  "Anthony Jeselnik on roasting, ripping off Jack Handey, and giving the devil his own TV show". Interview with Nathan Rabin, www.avclub.com. March 12, 2013.

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• I've always thought of myself as an African-American comedian, African-American man, everything.

  Jordan Peele

  Men, African American

  "Keegan-Michael Key and Jordan Peele of Key & Peele". Interview With Jesse Thorn, tv.avclub.com. March 20, 2012.

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• At the same time, we can't blame comedians for taking time to learn. Any critic of comedy who believes that he has always, universally, been on the right side of justice is engaging in a hypocrisy that is itself a joke.

  Guy Branum

  Believe, Hypocrisy, Justice

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• I told them I wanted to be a comedian, and they laughed; I became a comedian, no one's laughing now

  Bob Monkhouse

  Laughing, Wanted, Laughed

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• Jamie Kilstein is amazing and I will be spreading the word. He has the spark that energized my conscience. We need more comedians kicking it hard the way he does every night

  Robin Williams

  Night, Kicking It, Doe

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• I spent 25 years as a stand-up comedian.

  Steven Michael Quezada

  Years, Stand Up Comedian

  "'Breaking Bad's' Gomez on 'Ozymandias': At Least 'I Didn't Get Melted in Acid' (Q&A)". Interview with Aaron Couch, www.hollywoodreporter.com. September 16, 2013.

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• Comedians dissect jokes all the time. Comedians are beautiful structuralists. But ultimately it's an athletic endeavor. You have to be able to just hit the backhand. You can't think about all the pieces of it. You can't think about your swing. You just have to do it. Reading someone else's deconstruction of what I do, all it does is put me in my head. On nights when the show goes particularly well, I am not aware of its fluidity. A lot of nights I'm just worried that I'm not going to be as good as the script in front of me.

  Stephen Colbert

  Beautiful, Reading, Night

  "Stephen Colbert: The Playboy Interview". Interview with Eric Spitznagel, www.ericspitznagel.com. October 27, 2012.

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