Comedian Quotes - Page 24

• When you're in Hollywood and you're a comedian, everybody wants you to do other things. All right, you're a stand-up comedian, can you write us a script? That's not fair. That's like if I worked hard to become a cook, and I'm a really good cook, they'd say, "OK, you're a cook. Can you farm?"

  Mitch Hedberg

  Funny, Writing, Humor

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• You just got to be really logical when you're a comedian - to a fault. Like a lawyer's got to believe in the law.

  Chris Rock

  Believe, Law, Faults

  Source: www.rollingstone.com

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• I always wanted to be a comedian, even when I was a little kid. I had a funny father who was in the news business, by the way. He was a radio news guy. So the news was always in my house, and funny was always in my house. It was sort of just baked into the DNA that I would do this for a living, but I can remember being less than 10 years old and dreaming about being a comedian.

  Bill Maher

  Dream, Father, Kids

  Source: www.usatoday.com

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• I gravitated toward being a funny guy. I liked the radio comedians. I lived in the Golden Age of radio, and the Golden Age of television came along when I was still in my early teens.

  George Carlin

  Guy, Age, Golden

  Source: mavericksofthemind.com

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• I became a guy who wanted to be a comedian someday, or a comic actor. The way I put it was, I'll be like Danny Kaye. He was kind of the model I had in mind.

  George Carlin

  Guy, Mind, Actors

  Source: mavericksofthemind.com

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• The whole idea of celebrity is flattering - it helps you get into restaurants and stuff - but once you obtain some creative fulfillment, which you do on a nightly basis as a comedian, it's hard to give that up just to be the wacky neighbor on a show.

  Jim Gaffigan

  Ideas, Giving, Creative

  "Jim Gaffigan Talks to Brian Regan About Hating Being Called a 'Clean' Comedian, Resisting Hollywood, and Playing Big Venues". Interview with Jim Gaffigan, www.vulture.com. September 23, 2015.

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• I personally have no interest in being a star or a celebrity. I want my stand-up comedy and how I think as a comedian to be recognized and successful.

  Jim Gaffigan

  Stars, Successful, Thinking

  Source: www.vulture.com

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• The toughest nights when I was a young, unknown comedian were opening for these real old-time Italian singers. I'm like Grace Jones to them. "This guy is nuts-talking about socks. Where's the wife jokes, where's the fat jokes?"

  Jerry Seinfeld

  Funny, Real, Night

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• Everyone goes "every comedian does Arnold Schwarzenegger". Yes, they do; but do they do Arnold Schwarzenegger in Brokeback Mountain?

  Pablo Francisco

  Brokeback Mountain, Doe, Schwarzenegger

  Source: rocksucker.co.uk

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• When I get up in the morning, I go and I work with beautiful women and charming men and funny comedians and dramatic artists. And I'm presented with costumes and great music to choose from and sets. I travel a certain amount of places, so I've been living in a bubble. And I like it.

  Woody Allen

  Beautiful, Morning, Artist

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• I'm a comedian. I make comic films and there are certain ideas that occur to me that are comic, with heavy, serious undertones. There are some ideas that are more frivolous to me. The next idea that could occur to me could be comedy about death and famine or something.

  Woody Allen

  Ideas, Next, Serious

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• Comedy is crowded. There are hundreds of comedians in every place in the world.

  Trevor Noah

  World, Comedy, Crowded

  Source: variety.com

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• I think, as a comedian, the funniest you can be is with people you know, and [whom] you've known for years, in a pub. That's as funny as you get, and so the aim [while stand-up] is to get that funny on stage with 5,000 strangers, to get that funny in a room where people shouldn't be listening but they are.

  Ricky Gervais

  Thinking, Years, People

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• Funny bones, to me, are more important than funny lines. If a comedian is just not likable and doing the lines, you could read them yourself. Whereas if someone [you like] shambles out, and they tell you what a bad day they've had, they don't have to say anything. I love them. I want to hug them because they've been through something. And it comes back to empathy, always empathy.

  Ricky Gervais

  Bad Day, Empathy, Hug

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• There have been many definitions of hell, but for the English the best definition is that it is the place where the Germans are the police, the Swedish are the comedians, the Italians are the defense force, Frenchmen dig the roads, the Belgians are the pop singers, the Spanish run the railways, the Turks cook the food, the Irish are the waiters, the Greeks run the government, and the common language is Dutch.

  David Frost

  Sarcastic, Running, Government

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• Canadian comedians are generally more well-rounded... They have to do a lot more. In order to have a career in this country, you have to do everything. And in the States you can narrow-cast, you can be just a sitcom performer or a stand-up comedian or a sketch performer.

  Scott Thompson

  Country, Careers, Order

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• Chevy Chase and Bill Murray - we thought those guys were funny. We love Bill Murray, but we didn't think they were right for Airplane! because it would step on the joke if there was a known comedian.

  David Zucker

  Love, Airplane, Thinking

  "Biography / Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• Everyone thinks I'm a comedian - which I am and are. I was born into a comedic family but I'm trained as an actor.

  Marlon Wayans

  Thinking, Actors, Born

  Source: www.indielondon.co.uk

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• The skill of a good actor is to make it always seem like you're in that fantastically spontaneous moment. Very often, a stand-up comedian has a different instinct, which is to reinvent. Once you've laid down some material, and made them laugh, you move on and find some new material.

  Colin Firth

  Moving, Skills, Laughing

  "St Trinian's - Colin Firth interview". www.indielondon.co.uk.

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• Most comedians want to be the architect of their own embarrassment. They have horrible self-esteem issues. I would rather push myself into the mud. I don't want to be pushed into the mud. I think that is probably true. I think most people struggle with self-acceptance. But comedians get a chance to self externalize.

  Mike Myers

  Self Esteem, Struggle, Acceptance

  Source: www.movieweb.com

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• Sometimes I don't want to go out and socialize; I just want to watch my favorite shows and comedians. But then I have to remember that it is important to participate in life if you want to portray real life on screen.

  Josh Peck

  Real, Important, Watches

  Source: www.movieweb.com

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• If you make a bad movie about stand-up, then comedians will mock you for the rest of your life.

  Judd Apatow

  Rest Of Your Life, Bad Movies, Mock

  Interview with Gregg LaGambina, www.avclub.com. July 30, 2009.

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• The first comedians I became fascinated with were the Marx brothers. I couldn't get enough of them. Later in life, I thought, "Well, maybe it's because they were so rebellious and they were just flipping the bird to society and all the rules we're supposed to follow." They were saying that none of it is fair.

  Judd Apatow

  Brother, Later In Life, Bird

  Interview with Gregg LaGambina, www.avclub.com. July 30, 2009.

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• My problem with being in New York City is that you really can't make a living as a comedian. You can, but you have to also take writing jobs, which means less stage time.

  Mike Birbiglia

  Jobs, New York, Mean

  Interview with Steve Heisler, www.avclub.com. November 11, 2008.

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• Jewish comedians do the best Jewish jokes, and anyone else doing that, they don't have a right to, because they're not coming from that experience. I know that's a slightly heightened example, but it's the same thing. We're bumpkins, so we can make bumpkin jokes.

  Simon Pegg

  Example, Do The Best, Jokes

  "Nick Frost, Simon Pegg, and Edgar Wright of Hot Fuzz". Interview with Keith Phipps, film.avclub.com. April 18, 2007.

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