Some people play a horse to win, some to place. I should have bet this horse to live.
He is the only man I ever met with a seersucker face.
My brother then opened a tall man's shop in Tokyo.
I played a lot of tough clubs in my time. Once a guy in one of those clubs wanted to bet me $10 that I was dead. I was afraid to bet.
Why are you hitting me, there is nobody behind us!
My wife and I got remarried. Our divorce didn't work out.
If a joke is too hard to visualize, I tell the young comics, then what the hell good is it?
My wife has a keen sense of humor. The more I humor her, the better.
Now, the band that inspired that great saying, "Stop The Music!!"
I've been married for 49 years. Where have I failed?
My son is 21. He'll be 22 if I let him.
A motel is where you give up good dollars for bad quarters.
I'm paid to make an idiot out of myself. Why do you do it for free?
He had a defect, which to a comic might be fatal. He wasn't funny.
My brother was a lifeguard in a car wash.
Take my wife... Please!
My horse was so late getting home, he tiptoed into the stable.
Let's get up here before we get killed!
"What's the latest dope on Wall Street?" "My son!"
There is no spark like the one ignited under the aspirations of a new graduate.
She has a wash and wear bridal gown.
She's a big-hearted girl with hips to match.
She must have Egyptian blood. Every time I try to kiss her she says, "Tut, Tut!"
How do Polish people spell farm? E-I-E-I-O
In elementary school, many a true word is spoken in guess.
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