My grandfather once told me that there were two kinds of people: those who do the work and those who take the credit. He told me to try to be in the first group; there was much less competition.
Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?
Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened.
If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn't sit for a month.
A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
Of all the things I've lost I miss my mind the most.
By the time a man realizes that his father was right, he has a son who thinks he's wrong.
We’re all a little weird. And life is a little weird. And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying weirdness — and call it love — true love.
The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time.
You can observe a lot by just watching.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary.
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
The duty of a patriot is to protect his country from its government.
I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?
A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's: She changes it more often.
It would be nice to spend billions on schools and roads, but right now that money is desperately needed for political ads.
You can't have everything. Where would you put it?
Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you an automobile.
Do not worry if others do not understand you. Instead worry if you do not understand others.
The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, he was a genius.
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